This Guy Loves To Party

I can’t take it anymore! I’m finally posting this after countless requests – just too many people wanted to see this post.

I weighed a little less than 160 lbs. all throughout high school. One time I got sick, and that weight even went down to about 155 lbs! Like about 90% of other red-blooded males, I scoured the Internet in search of ways to build muscle.

I didn’t take any measurements or do any health-related tests, but I have one indisputable indicator of progress: before and after photos.

Here are a few comparative shots. Oh, and I forgot to mention, all of this was done with one 30-minute workout, for a total of 30 MINUTES of gym time:

How did I do it?

Here are the six basic principles that made it happen:

1. Sit at a computer for a couple hours at the beginning of the day. Do nothing physical.

2. Create a backdrop and lighting set-up that does not cast any favorable shadows on your body that might reveal musculature.

3. Do not actually flex during any poses, and in fact, have noticeably different postures than the “after” picture.

4. Go to the gym and work out really hard. Get a nice pump going.

5. Return to that backdrop you set up, but change the lighting so that it casts shadows that exaggerate your musculature. This will complement the pump you’ve got going very nicely.

6. Do the following: flex your muscles, stick your feet out, and change your hand positions so that they favor a more muscular look.

BONUS: if I had eaten a lot of carbs and drank a lot of water before the first set of pictures, I could have looked fatter!  I also wish I had more body hair in the “before” shots.

Want to absolutely transform your body?  Follow these guidelines, put in your 30 minutes, and you can make yourself look totally amazing for about an hour (until the pump wears out).

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So what’s the point of this?

The more that I’ve studied marketing, the more I’ve come to resent a lot of the manipulative tactics that the hot shots use.

This post, if you didn’t know, is a direct parody of one of Tim Ferriss’ most popular blog posts, From Geek to Freak: How I Gained 34 lbs. of Muscle in 4 Weeks.  (As of this writing, he’s nearing almost 800 comments on that post, most of which are from people who are excited by his pictures and about to try the program themselves.)

I remember running across that post about a year ago and being blown away by his results.  I stumbled on it again recently, though, and immediately recognized all the manipulative tactics he used in his before and after shots that make his results seem better than they actually are.  I’ve tried to mimic his every posture in my above photo set.

His hands in the “after” shots indicate he’s flexing and more tensed than in the “before”.  His feet are angled outwards in the “after” shots, which give a more three-dimensional shape to the legs.  The final “before” shot – where he’s standing facing straight at the camera – features maybe the most unnatural standing posture in the history of mankind.  (Try it yourself – stand up straight and angle your palms facing backwards, hands at your waist.  It not only twists your arms and shoulders in, making them appear smaller, but it feels awful.)

Also it’s easy to see that the lighting is completely different in both shots.  (Just take a look at his shadows.)  The after shot has much more favorable, indirect lighting.

All of these differences are so subtle, though, that most people would never notice.

Maybe the results and numbers he lists are the real deal.  I really doubt all of it, though, since he is clearly trying to manipulate us with his before and after shots.  And if he has to use manipulative tactics for a blog post on gaining muscle, what can we expect from an entire book about it?

All marketers are liars

I want to get out of the way that I’m a huge Tim Ferriss fanboy.  The 4 Hour Work Week gave me the inspiration to leave my job, get rid of my stuff, and pursue things I never would have before.  I wait for his every blog post with baited breath. The guy seems very, very focused and good at almost everything he does.  (Watch any video of him speaking other languages – he’s good.)

But he also embellishes – a lot.  And not just in the “you’re a hater, I just work very hard and get things done” type of way, as this post reveals.

And this is true for a lot of marketers, especially more amateur ones.  The blog world is packed with these people.  They embellish their results for the sake of traffic, and damage the free trade of good, solid information in the process.

Listen, if you know how to do something, that’s awesome.  Share it with the world and make all of our lives easier and better.  But if you have to embellish your results to be able to get your message out, then don’t waste our time.

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 14th, 2009 at 1:45 am and is filed under Fitness.